Even though we are living in uncertain times, we know that God is with us. The past few weeks, I’ve been reading through the life of Jesus. I don’t know how many times I’ve done this, but each time I make new discoveries and gain new insight into our Savior and Lord.
This time, I’m noticing how often Jesus would tell people to be quiet about what He had done for them. This was very odd because you can also see all the things He did when crowds of people showed up at His doorstep. In those times, He healed everyone and drove out demons. Then there were other times, in certain places, when He would heal someone and tell them to keep quiet about it.
There were even times when people, including His own family, wanted Him to go public with some type of great campaign to display His power and spark a movement to overthrow their oppressors, but He always retreated from those aspirations. It seems that Jesus was very sensitive to seasons and regions.
He had come into this world with a very specific mission and He wasn’t going to allow critics to deter Him, or His biggest fans to propel Him. He was going to remain in step with His Father’s plan and purpose.
Today, Jesus’ journey is giving me some wisdom and confidence for the future of our little gathering and the entire Church in America. As we watch the suffocating grip of a new system of government slowly coming upon our nation, all of us are left to wonder, how the church can continue in such an environment. Freedom of speech is essentially nullified. Gay Rights and Pro-Choice activist have vilified all religious organization. Muslims, within America, are now being called upon to start a holy jihad against Jews and Christians, and even Homeland Security has now classified many Christian groups as domestic terrorist.
Believers all over America are having dreams about soldiers invading their homes through the initiation of martial law; stripping away all citizen rights. Like us, many pastors and Christian leaders are beginning to implement plans and strategies to launch home church and under-the-radar gatherings, right here in America.
As I share these things, please don’t panic. The Church has survived all kinds of cruel and harsh governments and movements. It’s just that in America, now it’s our turn to face the real struggle that has been going on, all along, all over the world.
I also noticed, in my daily Bible readings, that Jesus was still able to preach the message of the Kingdom and travel from place to place even though they were under the dominating rule of the Roman Empire. The Romans were performing military house to house searches back then. They were tormenting and harassing average citizens back then. They were wrecking the lives of business owners back then. They ruled, in many regions, through martial law. Everything that we see coming upon America, was being done in the world in which Jesus Christ was spreading the message of the Kingdom of God.
This has assured me that we can trust God to help us to navigate through whatever awaits us in the coming months and years in America. Like Jesus, we’re not trying to become famous or takeover the governments of this world.
We are not trying to display miraculous power just to gain access to popular mainstream media. Most assuredly, WE WILL DO GREAT THINGS FOR GOD, but they are going to be done to reach and teach those who have an ear to hear and a heart to receive the true and living God.
This upcoming Sunday, we will continue with our STEALTH Ministry Training. STEALTH is our acronym for Spiritual Training for the Equipping, Anointing, Liberation and Transformation of Hearts and Homes. This is part of our effort
to obey God’s command to me, to RESET ourselves and prepare us for a new way to minister in this new version of America.
It is our hope and prayer that by the time we complete this training, we will have established strong Believers who can serve God and their families by doing the work of the ministry outside of the four walls of a church.
Our goal is to build a team of people who can serve God and one another, without seeking fame, glory, recognition and praise. It is our goal to build a team of people who can help us rebuild, renew and restore hearts and homes in the urban community.
Lately I've been reconsidering how I present our ministry to Believers who are considering membership. I have decided that I'm not going to soft peddle our mission and vision just to gain members. I have had to settle it. Our church mission isn't for everybody.
In fact; What if our Church presented itself the same way the Marines do? What if we stopped using the promise of wealth, material blessings and miraculous healing as our way to draw people into our fellowship? What if we just told it like it really is? You're signing up for something that's greater than yourself. You're signing up for Spiritual Warfare.
Do you have the heart for this?
You may recall that just a week ago we told you about an African country that closed nearly 100 churches. The president of Cameroon used some negative incidents and a few bad pastors as his leverage to close them. You may also recall that we said that we should expect this same strategy to be used in America to close churches.
We thought it might happen in a few years. We were wrong. It only took two weeks for an incident to come that could start the process in America.
We just saw another alarming BREAKING NEWS posting. A measles outbreak in Texas is being blamed on Pastor Kenneth Copeland, his mega-church, and his teachings about faith and healing. Since some of the people who attend his church failed to get measles vaccinations, the media is blaming him and his ministry for the outbreak.
We can now expect the next step. Somebody, perhaps a State Representative, a Senator, or someone with great influence, will make a proposal to close the church and any other ministries that are viewed in the same way.
More and more, God is showing us that HE has been preparing us for a very dark time that is coming upon America. A lot more pastors had better start getting their congregations ready for home church gatherings and internet ministry.
Just last week, in a country in Africa (Cameroon), the president of that nation ordered the closing of nearly 100 Pentecostal churches. He cited the wrong doings of a few bad ministers in that nation. He used their inappropriate actions as the basis to close down churches. Since he used the military to do it, nearly 100 pastors and congregations had no choice.
This past Sunday, hundreds of church goers suddenly found themselves forced to do what we are already accustomed to doing in Urban Life. They had to meet in their homes.
We should not be so naive and ignorant that we ignore the real possibility of this same strategy being used to close churches in America. With all of the uncertainty in our nation we have been seeking God about the right strategy for our church. I don't know how many pastors, in America, are preparing their congregations for this possibility.
Right now, the best thing I can do is to teach, train and encourage our church family to seek God and stand up as leaders in their own homes. I want them to know that no matter what the future holds, they can keep moving forward. They have what they need. They can do this. They can rebuild, renew and restore their families.
I pray that God blesses their home group gatherings in a very special way!
A couple of weeks ago, I was reading my morning devotional from Oswald Chamber’s ‘My Utmost for His Highest’. I’ve been reading this particular book for many years, but it’s still amazing how God can speak something new into my heart each year that I go through it.
This particular day’s reading led me to a profound thought. The Holy Spirit of God reminded me of the words of Jesus when he was twelve years old. You can find his response to His parents, who had been searching for him for several days. Luke 2:49 records his response to them: “Why did you seek Me? Did you not know that I must be about My Father’s business?” The Bible goes on to say,”.…they did not understand His statement, but then He went down with them and came to Nazareth, and was subject to them, but His mother kept all these things in her heart."
After this, the Holy Spirit reminded me of Jesus’ words when He was a thirty-something year old man. In John 5: 19 He says: "Most assuredly, I say to you, the Son can do nothing of Himself, but what He sees the Father do; for whatever He does, the Son also does in like manner.”
The twelve year old Christ was full of zeal and ready to go forth with God’s work, but He had a process to go through. The thirty year old Christ shows us the result of going through this process.
As a human being, Jesus had to learn obedience. The almighty God of the universe, while dwelling in human flesh, subjected himself to earthly, human, flawed parents.
We must go through the same process. There are many 'twelve-year old' adolescents in the Body of Christ, who are out on their own, having pulled away from their spiritual family, and they are trying to be about God’s business. But like the boy Jesus, they need to go home. They need to submit to spiritual leaders and parents, who are human beings, with flaws and failings.
Many adolescent Believers are in rebellion because they discovered the flaws and failings of their leaders. They felt that this discovery gave them the right to leave them and start their own church or ministry. They felt it gave them the right to ignore the counsel and guidance of their leaders.
This has led to thousands of churches starting all over America. There are often three and four church buildings in one inner city block, in neighborhoods across the country. However, many of them are merely gatherings of rebellious and naive spiritual adolescents, seeking attention and affirmation.
We believe that the trials and tribulations of these last days will filter out the adolescents from the adults. There will be a distinction between the immature and the mature. The mature ones will be those who have submitted to the process and progression of Christ.
After submitting to His parents, the only thing the Bible says about the next 18 years of Jesus’ life was recorded in Luke 2:52 which states: And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men.
I certainly want to be that kind of leader and I consider it an honor to oversee people who desire the same.
A few years ago, one of my colleagues labeled me ‘the contemplative pastor’. He said I was always approaching issues and problems with thoughts and perspective that are not very important to most people, but they are keys for introducing understanding into any situation.
I didn’t know how to take that statement at that time. I thought I was a straight forward, in your face, kind of minister. However, as I look back over the past nine years, I can see how the Lord has led us on a path that has required us to look beyond the surface of every negative issue in our hearts and homes.
A couple of days ago, someone posted a five minute video clip of a pastor publicly correcting various men in the congregation. One was a young man who wanted to get married, but he told the brother, “You don’t even attend church, and now you want me to perform your wedding?” Then he looked at his fiancée and asked, “Do you want to marry a man who doesn't come to church?”
Next, he publicly corrected the young man in the video room because apparently he allows the youth of the church to gather in that room to socialize instead of making them go out into the auditorium.
One thing that caught my attention was that the pastor said he was ready to quit and go start again with a small group of people who really needed help.
Needless to say, most of the comments regarding the video were all about abusive leaders. However, one person said this pastor’s rant was similar to the way Jesus talked to religious people in His day. The video was stirring up quite a debate as people began to throw scriptures back and forth to support their positions. Some felt the video segment demonstrated correction in love. Others felt that it was abuse.
Well, you guys know me. I jumped in and said it was impossible to draw a conclusion to the video because it was only a five minute clip from an entire sermon. I shared that it’s impossible to make a judgment based upon five minutes of what seems like a pastor going off on the congregation. I asked: What was said before those five minutes? What was said after the five minutes? The pastor may have apologized afterwards. What happened after the service? We don’t know, so we can’t make a determination.
I added that I felt it was wrong for the pastor to do this publicly, but I also stated that we don’t know what led up to this moment. We don’t know what level of rebellion that may have been present in this congregation.
Of course you guys know that I was not justifying abuse, but (being the contemplative pastor) I could not dismiss the obvious frustration, discouragement and the possible depression this pastor may have been wrestling with in that moment.
I share this with you today to remind you to not be so quick to judge the flaws and failings in people. We don’t know the history behind a sudden outburst of rage or anger. As we have learned from our first lesson about mental illness, some people are battling with issues that are not obvious from the outside. Some people are on medication, and even though the medication is helping their brain chemistry, the side effects can produce agitation and anger.
We just don’t know the whole story behind the things that people say and do.
Many Believers don’t realize that there are hundreds of pastors who are being abused by their congregations, board of elders, and overseers. We only tend to think of pastors being the perpetrators of abuse within a congregation. It’s sort of like the way we view domestic abuse as always being a man beating on a woman, but believe me, there are countless cases of men who are being abused by their wives. They don’t say anything in order to protect the children or because no one will believe them.
It is my prayer that as we grow in grace and in the knowledge of Jesus Christ, that we will develop hearts of compassion and understanding. There is far too much judgmental-ism in the American church.
Several of my Facebook friends have posted very serious commentaries about a crop of reality TV shows that are about to hit the American masses about mega-church pastors and gospel music artist.
Most of the comments were very insightful, noting very serious concerns about how each ministry will be presented from an industry that edits the raw footage and manipulates the scenes to present a view of these ministers that can possibly be completely different from who they are in real life.
Other people, like us, were very concerned with how church leadership will be viewed after watching these shows. Since most Americans outside of the religious community already have very little respect for ministers, we don’t see how these shows will improve their perception. There is a saying in the media industry: Perception is reality.
As unfair as that statement may be, it is a fact in America. That’s why so many producers and directors of television and film are such masters of the art of manipulating reality. They know that in today’s world, whatever people perceive a person, place or thing to be, that first impression becomes set in their minds like hardened concrete. It is nearly impossible to change their thinking from that point forward.
It doesn’t matter how many statistics and examples that are placed in front of them; even if genuine, humble, hardworking pastors and singers are set before them, they will ALL be viewed through the lenses of that first perception that was received from the ‘Reality TV’ show. In all fairness, some of the shows may turn out to be very good. A few weeks ago, we saw one that was very tastefully done by the Sheards, a very famous gospel music and ministry family.
Since we’re very familiar with what goes on behind the scenes, we still view these shows with caution because there is always a bit of ‘staging’ that is taking place. The audience tends to forget that they are viewing the show from the perspective of a camera, lighting and audio crew that is setting up the scenes. We must also remember that people in front of the camera are being compensated for the show. No matter how much is shared, we will never get the entire story.
So having said this, we want to say that the best Reality show of a church and its leaders is the experience that members are sharing with the pastors in their own local church. One of the dangers of these new TV shows is that thousands of people will begin to judge the validity of their pastors and the mission of their home church, based upon what they see on these weekly TV packages.
Everything from the size of the congregation to the décor of the sanctuary will be judged and compared to what is shown on television. People will see where these folks live, what they wear and what they drive. Then they will look to see where their pastor lives, what they wear and what they drive. They will begin to set new standards in their own hearts to determine if whether they should support their pastor or find a church that’s more like what they see in these TV shows.
At the risk of sounding like we’re promoting ourselves and our ministry, we must share what the Bible has to say. We go to the Bible on this issue because we know the power and victory of a Word-filled life.
Did you know that the Bible already has a criteria set for how to know if whether you have good and solid pastoral leadership?
In 1 Timothy 3:1-10 the Bible gives us an easy-to-understand list. It says,
“This is a faithful saying: If a man desires the position of a bishop (church overseer), he desires a good work. A bishop (overseer) then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, temperate, sober-minded, of good behavior, hospitable, able to teach; not given to wine, not violent, not greedy for money, but gentle, not quarrelsome, not covetous; one who rules his own house well, having his children in submission with all reverence (for if a man does not know how to rule his own house, how will he take care of the church of God?); not a novice, lest being puffed up with pride he fall into the same condemnation as the devil. Moreover he must have a good testimony among those who are outside, lest he fall into reproach and the snare of the devil.”
Also look at the qualification list found in Titus. Titus 1:6-9— “….if a man is blameless, the husband of one wife, having faithful children not accused of dissipation or insubordination. For a bishop [overseer] must be blameless, as a steward of God, not self-willed, not quick-tempered, not given to wine, not violent, not greedy for money, but hospitable, a lover of what is good, sober-minded, just, holy, self-controlled, holding fast the faithful word as he has been taught, that he may be able, by sound doctrine, both to exhort and convict those who contradict.”
If anyone can proclaim these things about their pastors and church leaders, then they are definitely in a good place. It has nothing to do with the size of the congregation, the type of facility they meet in, where the pastors live, what kind of car the pastor drives, what they wear, their outgoing personality, or their gifting to sing, preach or teach. It all comes down to what the Bible says about them.
So, REALITY should be found in your own church community. In other words, you want to be in a church where the pastors are setting an example of how to deal with everyday life. You need more than examples of how to perform on a stage two or three times a week. You need examples of how to be a husband, wife, father, mother, co-worker, or student. What are the leader’s attitudes in adversity? How do they face disappointments? How do they deal with success? Their lives need to be so REAL that you can learn how to fight for your family just by watching them.
If all they are getting is a weekly performance on a stage or in a pulpit, they may need to consider getting in touch with a REAL church family. We’re not saying we’re the only church like that in Harrisburg, but we are saying that we are one that believes in this kind of ministry.
I realize that we have a very radical ministry and I wish there was some way to show our church family how much I appreciate each of them for hanging in there with us. I know that it can be difficult to break the pattern of church attendance that has been passed down through countless generations, but they are doing it.
It's been quite a challenge to change from weekly church attendance to meeting two Sundays a month in a public gathering and two Sundays a month in family gatherings. Not many people would keep holding on and believing a leader who is doing something that no other church in the community is doing.
Our vision is very simple. We're following the pattern of the early church in Acts 2. The Bible says that they continued steadfast in the apostles doctrine and fellowship, in breaking of bread and in prayers. It describes how they met house to house and in the temple.
We believe that we are moving in a 21st century version of Acts 2. On the First Sunday of the month we have teaching and prayer. On the third Sunday of the month we have the breaking of bread and fellowship.
Now as we move into the summer months we are stepping up our teaching by starting new sessions of instruction to help us minister to family and friends who are facing some of life's most difficult challenges. We want to provide understanding of what people are going through.
At the request of one of our Urban Life members, we're going to talk about mental illness during our first Sunday in July gathering. In the following months, we're going to take on subjects like addiction, anxiety and depression. We believe that our ministry in Harrisburg is reaching the pinnacle of its purpose in this community. This type of teaching and instruction is going to be pivotal in helping us fulfill our purpose of rebuilding, restoring and renewing hearts and homes.
On the third Sunday in July, we're going to start the Lifetree conversations again. We have permission to host a monthly Sunday brunch in the United Church Center and we are going to include the one-hour discussion-based ministry. It is our hope that this will give us the perfect opportunity to invite our co-workers, classmates, neighbors and friends. It is our prayer that the Lifetree conversations will become a part of everyone's personal effort to lead and disciple someone into a genuine relationship with God.
In the meantime, our home church gatherings will continue on the second and fourth Sundays of each month.
Somehow I must believe that God is prophetically guiding us. In some way, we might be modeling the kind of change that is coming to America's churches. Through circumstances beyond our control, we were forced to alter our weekly gatherings. Now, we have developed a pattern of meetings that are actually far better than what we were doing in the past.
I believe the Lord is helping us the establish the first of many churches and ministries that we will oversee. Part of the prophetic word over us was that we would establish churches because we have an apostolic calling upon us. Harrisburg is becoming the model and template for what God has called us to do.
So I don't despise our small beginnings. Now I live in appreciation.
For the record, we want to make it known that we love our future daughter in law very much. From the moment we first met her, we knew that she was the ONE. Since she is from Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, there was apprehension on David’s part in telling us that his girlfriend was White and from another country and culture.
From our perspective, we were amazed that David had a girlfriend at all. He had always been very shy when it came to talking to young ladies. He told us that he had met someone before Michelle. She happened to be African American. However, she wasn’t willing to make the kind of commitment to Christ that was embedded in our son’s DNA. We thank God that he was not willing to compromise his walk with God for a pretty face.
Our first encounter with Michelle was through tragedy. The associate pastor of our home church suddenly and unexpectedly passed away. Thus, we had to make an emergency, unplanned trip to our home church for the funeral. As we were driving to St. Louis, we received a call on our cell phone. It was Michelle. She wanted to know if it was okay for her and David to drive to St. Louis for the funeral. She said it was obvious that this pastor had been someone that was very special to David and she didn’t want him to miss the service. The journey to St. Louis from Tulsa was nearly seven hours and they would have to take on the driving challenge in a quick weekend turn around so that they could get back to school on time. I her told it was okay with us as long as her parents approved.
We were deeply impacted by her love and concern for David. I was deeply impacted by her confidence and forthrightness to speak to her boyfriend’s dad. There was no pretense, no hidden agenda, and no hypocrisy. She was as real as David and his brothers. So, that’s how we first met her; at the funeral of a dear brother and friend.
Before that event David had been apprehensive about telling us about Michelle because he knew that his mother’s life had been negatively impacted by someone who was White. When Carol’s dad left the family, it was due to an adulterous affair with a woman who was White. So David was really concerned about how his mother would respond.
When Carol met our future daughter in law, there was instantly love for her. We have embraced her as one of our own. Our son’s Christopher and Jonathan have embraced her as their sister. Only outsiders make distinctions in countries, culture and color.
Tomorrow morning we journey to Tulsa, Oklahoma, the place where we first met, to see one of our son’s unite in Holy Matrimony to the love of his life. Life is truly amazing sometimes.
We’ll close this week’s letter with a song that we wrote many years ago called What God Alone Has Joined.
A million memories flood my mind
So many things I’ve left behind
Regrets and words that I’ve left unsaid
Like pages in a book unread
Did I do enough to prepare your way?
Did I live enough so that you can say?
Mom and Dad, God heard you when you prayed
And I can make this vow on my wedding day
They say I’m gaining a son, not losing a daughter
I’m gaining a daughter, not losing a son
So we fight back the tears beholding this union
Let no man put asunder, what God alone has joined
Toys and games now left in corners
Of rooms that will hold a different tomorrow
Recalling chills and spills, giggles and sorrows
My time as your parent was something I borrowed
Now the season has changed and that time is over
We let go today as father and mother
Now the chills and spills, giggles and sorrows
You will share in this life with a covenant partner
They say I’m gaining a son, not losing a daughter
I’m gaining a daughter, not losing a son
So we fight back the tears beholding this union
Let no man put asunder, what God alone has joined
As we watch God move in this ministry, we reflect back on how God started moving in our lives almost 26 years ago. As a young couple struggling in our emotions and our finances, we were fighting through many failures and poor decisions. In spite of how far we had fallen, God put His hand on us and chose us for a wonderful purpose.
For a long time, we thought that God’s purpose involved having a ministry with big crowds and being well-known, but now we now know that God had something in mind that was far more substantive than that.
In Psalm 119 a very special word appears throughout the passage. The writer says things like, ‘I long for your precepts’ or ‘I will keep your precepts’.
In our studies, we learned that this word, precept, is closely related to our modern word for prescription. It means God, just like a doctor, will make a very thorough examination and based upon what He sees in us He gives a set of regulations for us to follow that will bring healing. It’s the concept of a physician who performs a medical examination and based upon what he or she discovers in our bodies, they write out a prescription that will bring healing to that condition.
That's precisely what is happening to the Urban Life family right now. With the change in schedule, in going back and forth between meeting in our homes and meeting in a public gathering at the United Church Center, we have been yanked out of a religious routine. We are experiencing the love of God through our relationships and the Word of God is so practical that we can walk it out in everyday life.
Everything that we are doing is like a set of precepts; a prescription that God has provided to bring healing to our hearts and homes. Now, we can understand why the Psalmist would say, ‘Behold, I long for your precepts’. It's like saying, “Lord, I long for Your examination and prescribed regiment for me because You're going to heal me through this process.”
Today, we are able to look back to the season before we were sent to Harrisburg and see how God led us through a 17-year journey of preparation and healing. We didn't know how to explain it while we were living it, but today we have the words to articulate the many precepts that emerged from that season.
Godly precepts can help a couple build and sustain a long and happy marriage. They can help an individual build and sustain lasting relationships. They can help a church family rebuild, restore and renew hearts and homes.
Godly precepts were woven into the fabric of our marriage. Through every fight and painful night, we were following His prescriptions. Throughout the childbearing years and the endless tears, we were following His prescriptions. Through victories great and small, and when nothing seemed to be happening at all, we were following His prescriptions.
Now, we are giving others, what God has given to us. And we are very excited for them because we know what God did for us. He doesn't play favorites, so we know He’s going to continue to do great things for them. If they don’t shrink back, God is going to blow their minds with what He has in store for them. There is nothing too hard for the Lord. He has written the perfect healing prescription for you and your family!
This week I want to encourage you by sharing one of the ways you can deny satan and demonic spirits access in your hearts and homes. This is one of God’s promises for you and a powerful key to guiding our families to victory.
Proverbs 15:22 (NIV) says - Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.
What a marvelous and simple word of wisdom, but it is a major way we can avoid some serious pitfalls. Make the decision to begin to take council and seek advisers. However, seek the council and advice, not only from people who have failed like you may have failed, but also from those who have been successful in the areas where you are weak.
Too many people are willing to listen only to other people who are on the sinking Titanic with them. They feel that because another person is going through the same thing that they’re going through, that they can better relate to them. Even though it’s true that they can better understand what you’re going through, it doesn't mean they can help you get through it. There are some trials that are so complex that it takes more than just talking to someone who understands you. Sometimes you need someone who can really HELP you.
As a couple with a successful marriage, we have encountered many people who felt that since we didn't fight, separate or go through the pain of adultery, that we didn't have much to offer them. They felt that only leaders who had been through exactly what they have been through, could effectively speak into their lives.
Through the years, we have responded with some food for thought. If you can only connect with someone who has gone through exactly what you have gone through, then why follow Jesus? He wasn’t married, so why listen to Him?
He wasn’t divorced, so why listen to Him? He didn’t get high or have a problem with drinking, so why listen to Him? Jesus didn’t have a problem with lust and chasing women, so why listen to Him? Jesus didn’t have emotional problems so why listen to Him? Jesus didn’t struggle with self-esteem and lack of confidence, so why listen to Him?
If someone has to be in the same boat that we’re in, in order for us to listen to them, then we’re going to suffer a lot longer before we get the point and get healed and set free. And the point is that eventually you and I had better get on board with someone whose boat is not sinking.
We turn to Jesus, even though He didn’t experience failure like us, because He loves us, died for us, and we know that we can overcome, because He overcame sin, death, hell and the grave. He has been touched with the FEELINGS of our infirmities, even though He didn’t fall into the same sins and downfalls we have experienced.
So what is the lesson of wisdom?
If you want a successful marriage, talk to someone who has a successful marriage. If you want a successful business, talk to someone who has a successful business. If you want to be a successful parent, talk to successful parents. If you want to be a success, then talk to someone who is doing something and doing it well.
In other words, connect with success so that success can connect with you. Don’t restrict your questions and conversation only to the people who are struggling just like you.
Always remember that your plans will fail for lack of council, but with many advisers the plans will succeed.
Today, I announced the decision to cut back from meeting EVERY Sunday. Even though it seems crazy to do this in a time when pastors and ministries are scrambling and doing everything they can to gain members and add resources and income, I KNOW that God has spoken to me on this one.
Immediately after I got home from our gathering; after disclosing to our small church family that we are going to sacrifice quantity of gatherings for quality of gatherings, I checked out my facebook stuff and found this:
There's a difference between quitting and stopping.
Quitting is giving up before the goal is reached.
Stopping is a choice to end a specific activity, and continue to move forward in a different direction.
Quitting is associated with guilt and implies failure.
Stopping brings perspective, responsibility, restores balance, protects and preserves goals and resources (not to mention sanity), and plants the seed of hope. - Carl Prude Jr.
Carl is a one of our dearest and most genuine friends, colleagues and brother in our life. I receive this as a confirmation from the Lord today.
This week we want to continue talking to you about closing access to the illegal intrusions of the enemy.
Ephesians 6: 12-13 reads: For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.
When we talk about putting on the armor, we are actually talking about putting on the very nature of Christ to protect us from the ways the enemy tries to take advantage of circumstances and situations when things in life go wrong.
James 4:7-8a tells us: Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you…
We’ve spoken about this before, but some of the ways the enemy gained access to intrude into your life was through horoscopes, psychic readings, mystical objects like statutes and jewelry, demon infested music and movies, or violent video games. He literally breaks into your home, coming through the windows of your eyes and ears; getting directly to your thoughts.
We realize this may sound like we’re being overly dramatic, and maybe a bit too spooky or religious, but we want you just to consider this. If the enemy of your soul hates you, to what lengths do you think he will go to deceive God’s creation and drag them to hell with him?
Let me share a personal experience. Way back when I was in my 20’s, I absolutely loved the music of Earth, Wind and Fire. I may not have been their number one fan, but I was pretty close. If you’re familiar with that band, you know that they incorporated all kinds of mystical symbols and phrases in their songs.
I loved listening to their music in my headphones and that’s how I often fell asleep, listening to music. One night I fell asleep listening to their music and something strange happened. I saw the music in my sleep and it was like waves and streams of water circling around me. The music was like a fluid, but at the same time it was like air.
However, flying around in the music was demons. I could barely see them because they were moving too fast, but I knew they were spirits and I knew they were not friendly. They were encircling me as the music encircled me, because they were in the music. I began to panic as realized I was still sleeping. I began to try to wake myself up, but my body was paralyzed. I couldn't move in the dream and I couldn't move in real life. All I could do to break the spell was to say, ‘Jesus’. When I spoke His name, I woke up.
That was my first encounter and realization that there was more to music than just a good sound. So today, we call upon the heads of households, standing in the gap of the walls of your heart and home, to consider what you will allow to pass through that wall and into your heart and home. If something is from the demonic realm, you can be sure that the enemy will take advantage of the opening to attack you and your family.
You may find yourself getting depressed for no reason, anxious for no reason, angry for no reason, or fearful for no reason. You can find yourself with lustful thoughts for no reason, lonely thoughts for no reason, and suicidal thoughts for no reason. And yes, you can trace it back to those times where the enemy invaded your life, perhaps even years ago. He rushed through the door, or broke through the windows of your eyes and ears.
You may have bought a little souvenir during a vacation, but you didn't know that the person who sold you that little wooden god had prayed that its influence would follow the buyer for the rest of their life. We’re not trying to scare you, but we want to make you aware of the schemes and wiles of your enemy. He doesn't fight fair. He hates you. He hates your kids. And no one is exempt.
Like me, you may have been playing the music of your favorite entertainers, but you didn't realize that their influence is filling your heart with anxiety, fear, rage, lust, and even thoughts of suicide. A couple of months ago we read a news article that said a former pastor’s teenage son, shot and killed his whole family. There had been no previous record of violence or any behavioral problems in that young man’s life.
The world will call it mental illness. We’re telling you that at some time prior to that killing, there was a demonic, illegal intrusion; a HOME INVASION, by the enemy, taking advantage of open windows and doors through video games, movies, books, or music. He might have invaded that young man through bullying, harassment, accusations, insinuations, or religious condemnation, to plant those heinous thoughts in his heart and mind.
First let us say, don’t panic. Don’t get into fear. Just put on your spiritual armor. Let’s put on Christ. Then you’re going to close the open doors and windows of your life.
Most of you reading this email were like me. You just simply bought and listened to a CD of your favorite artist. For others, you like watching the horror and fantasy movies and you find yourself reciting the spells. You had no idea that this stuff is REAL and not just entertainment. Some of you just bought a board game, a video game, or a lucky charm. Some of you recited a mystical pledge, you were in a séance, you did a psychic reading, or some psychic healer told you to place a particular object under your pillow or beside your bed. You didn't know that these things were opening you up to the spiritual world, but it was NOT the Godly spiritual world.
Many years ago, God gave me a dream. I saw thick poisonous pollution in the sky over an entire city. As I looked closer, I saw the pollution coming out of the windows of homes and apartments. Then I looked closer and I could see into people’s homes and the pollution was pouring out of televisions and radios. I didn't know back then, that today, there would be cable TV, satellite TV and even satellite radio. The poisonous pollution of the enemy is pouring out of everything that we think of as being entertainment. There has been a national home invasion.
We’re not telling you what to watch and what to listen to everyday. We’re just encouraging you to guard your heart and home. One of today’s popular rap artist told a national media outlet that he doesn't allow his own children to listen to his music. Yet, he has no problem with poisoning the minds of your and my children and grandchildren.
As parents, we took an active part in guarding our home. Our sons can tell you. Because of our roles in ministry, we just could not allow our home to be invaded. We even set rules for people who stayed with us from time to time. When they broke the rules, we KNEW instantly because our sleep would be disturbed by those invading influences.
We bought our children their first CD players. We bought their first Christian rap music. We went with them to purchase video games. When we found something hidden in our home that was outside of the boundaries of our rules, we threw it out. Now our sons have reached adulthood and they can make their own choices, but at least they know how serious this is. And just like our adult children, now it is your opportunity to close the doors and windows to the home invasion of the enemy.
In our most recent blogs, we have talked about and prayed for all of our heads of households and their role in leading and guarding their families. This week we want to continue to talk to the heads of households, but please understand that these principles apply to all of us in guarding our hearts and homes.
We have observed that there are two methods of attack that come from the enemy. When we say enemy, we mean satan and demonic powers and their influences. When we say demonic, we mean those evil spiritual entities, personalities and beings that hate God and by default, hate you because you are a creation of God. There is no negotiating with them. There is no room for making deals, pacts, alliances or agreements with them. Even for those people who have supposedly made a pact with the devil, they do not realize that they have been deceived and no great reward awaits them.
Satan and demonic powers gain entry into your life in two ways. It’s either by ILLEGAL intrusion or through LEGAL access. Today we want to begin talking about the first way the enemy of your soul comes in and that way is like a burglar or a home invasion robbery. It’s simply ILLEGAL intrusion.
First of all, please understand that satan has no legal right into the life and affairs of a born again, surrendered heart and life to Jesus Christ. He has no legal right when he barges into the Believer’s life. He is a trespasser, a violator and he knows it. He comes into your life hoping that you will tolerate him.
Before we go any further, we want to make it clear that every time something bad happens to you, it does not mean you have been attacked by a demon or by satan. The following explanation is oversimplified, but we hope you understand our point.
We must accept the reality that we live in a fallen, frail and fractured world. We live amongst imperfect people who are making choices and many of those choices affect us and everyone around them.
We live in a world where gas runs out, time moves on, machines wear down, accidents happen, and plans fail. Due to gravity, objects will fall and break. Human frailty means we can slip or stumble. Sometimes we guess and we guess wrong. Sometimes we assume and circumstances change and our assumption goes awry. Sometimes we miscalculate.
It was not a demon. It wasn’t even a particular sin. We live in a world in which sin and evil have caused it to be broken and unpredictable. In this sense, we are all living with the consequences of sin. So everything negative that happens to us is not always a direct demonic attack.
However, we can tell you that when things go wrong, sin and satanic powers are always crouching and waiting for the opportunity to take advantage of any negative situation. That’s why we must be very intentional about our relationship with God.
When evil forces jump in to take advantage of the mishaps and mistakes, God says in His word: Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might. Put on the whole armor of God that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. (Ephesians 6:10-12).
After getting off to a very rough start, we have spent the last 25+ years of our life and marriage, trying to keep the atmosphere of our hearts and home open to the voice, will and purpose of God. We have tried to maintain healthy practices and a lifestyle that minimizes the consequences of living in a fallen world and maximizes the benefits of living in the Kingdom of God. We have learned that you can truly live IN this world, but not be OF this world.
We have employed simple things like daily Bible and devotional readings, playing worship music throughout the day while we work, and guarding what we entertain on television or on the internet.
Before we became pastors, we learned the value of weekly gatherings with the Church for prayer, praise, worship, teaching and fellowship. Somehow, God always gave us what we needed for the upcoming week. We found that we were prepared for those unforeseen pitfalls and battles. God’s peace kept us from making devastating decisions concerning our family.
We noticed that these Godly practices kept us from being filled with anxiety about everyday life and our future. It kept our faith built up and strong. It kept us ready for the crisis moments in life, so that we didn't fall apart when things went terribly wrong. That’s our desire for you and your family.
When the Lord called us out and sent us into the ministry, we had the typical grand vision of a large congregation, a powerful worship team and a huge staff of leaders and volunteers reaching out to the community to make disciples of the Lord Jesus Christ.
However, what we experienced was so far from what we envisioned that we often felt we had made a mistake in even starting a church. I often felt I should just pack it all in, tuck my tail in, return to the St. Louis church community, and just admit that we blew it because we never should have been so arrogant as to think we should be doing this.
After eight years of ministry and almost nine years of living in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, we still minister to only about ten to twelve people each week in a small space that is basically a room for various church and outreach organizations to hold their board meetings.
We move a couple of tables in an effort to arrange the space to make it conducive for teaching and fellowship. Directly across the hall we utilize a small conference room to provide an hour of fun for the children that occasionally attend. We have a large library of Bible DVDs and we have scheduled a full year of 30-minute videos that have accompanying activities like coloring pages, puzzles and games for children.
We do this every week, every Sunday morning.
Just when I’m feeling like we’re just spinning our wheels and not really making much progress, I recently got feedback from those who attend and have made an amazing discovery.
I find that the strategy of opening our weekly gathering with prayer and meditation while singing along with worship videos is perfectly suited for this family of believers. With no ‘personality’ standing before us, urging us to lift our hands or shout certain phrases, each person is able to settle in and focus their attention upon the Lord. We find that our hearts are able to connect with the Spirit of God in a more intimate way that goes beyond the coercion and persuasion of a “worship leader.”
I’m not opposed to having a worship leader. I’ve been one. I’ve desired to have one. But after eight years of trying to fulfill that image and vision, I finally gave in to what God wanted and what this community of Believers needed.
As we transition from this very personal time of prayer and worship, we take a break for fellowship before shifting into our teaching session. This gives everyone some time to reconnect with one another after a long week.
Our teaching style has been very simplistic. I use power point presentations and video clips to help attendees to engage in the Word of God in a very personal way. I have discovered that our teaching style allows the Holy Spirit to teach people well beyond the words I’m actually saying.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that God is really in control of what is happening in Urban Life. From our youngest members to the grandparents, God is doing something unique in our midst.
I guess it becomes tough for me to adjust to this because I’m so accustomed to measuring success in terms that are quantifiable. But in this strategy, I cannot measure the effectiveness or success of what we’re doing by attendance patterns or financial income.
More and more, I realize that we will never know what is really happening here, until we stand before the Lord at the judgment seat of Christ; when we are rewarded for our service to Him.
More and more I realize that the sense of fulfillment must come out of my relationship WITH God and not just what I think I am accomplishing FOR God. More and more I realize that we have been called to something that is so different and so unique that I must simply do what I see God doing and say what I hear God saying. More and more I realize that I must be more like Jesus. More and more I realize that my goal must simply be to please Him.
Today, I want conclude my 3-blog appeal to the men. I’ve been writing to you guys out of the context of Nehemiah 4: 13 which says: Therefore I positioned men behind the lower parts of the wall, at the openings; and I set the people according to their families, with their swords, their spears, and their bows.
This week I want to share what this means regarding taking on the role to be the first to pray and intercede for your family. Don’t wait for someone else to do it, not even the pastor or some other spiritual leader. You are not only a protector and provider, but you are also a priest in your home.
From the time our children were in kindergarten and all the way through high school graduation, I felt that I was responsible to pray with them every school day. As head of the household, I felt it was my job; not because I was
'the man' but simply because I was the head of the household.
Even though my wife and I shared in that responsibility, I felt I was supposed to take the lead. Even though church traditions promote fond thoughts about a mother’s prayer, I wanted my sons to know that their dad was praying for them.
Every morning I led them in a prayer before they went out the door for school. When the years came in which I needed to drive them to school, I recited this prayer before releasing them from the car. I prayed the same prayer every day. I wanted them to memorize it, without telling them to memorize. However, they can recite it to this day and I have a suspicion they will recite it over their children someday.
I prayed, “Thank You Lord for Christopher, Jonathan and David. Help them to have a good day at school, today. Give them your grace, favor, protection and wisdom; in Jesus’ name, Amen.”
Sometimes I would add something else if I felt led to do so. Every morning, Monday through Friday, they got this prayer from their dad before they walked out the door or stepped out of the car. Many nights and weekends, I’d go into their rooms and lay my hands on them while they slept and just whispered a prayer of protection or something about their future. This is what I mean when I talk about Nehemiah’s strategy to position men behind the walls.
Today, Carol and I are still positioned on that wall as we’re investing into their college educations and helping them transition into adulthood and life beyond their parents. We’re not sacrificing our son’s futures by holding on to our selfish desires, to do all the things we always wanted to do. We're doing whatever we can to push them forward.
Now it’s all about being in position to prepare them to cover their families.
The same priestly calling applies to praying for my wife. Even though I don’t pray with her as often as I need, I still pray for her all the time. In the late night, I lay my hands on her shoulder and pray over her. This not only closes the gaps in spiritual warfare, but it closes the gaps in our relationship.
It’s hard to be critical and judgmental of your wife, if you’re praying for her. All the things that would irritate you or anger you, melts away as you pray for your spouse. The Spirit of God opens you up to see her struggles, fears and insecurities. Then He gives you wisdom and shows you many ways to help her, heal her, and secure her in your love for her.
You can do it brothers!
For I am confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ. (Philippians 1:6b)
I read an article about the trends of church attendance in America today. I responded with the following:
I loved the article. It definitely describes the dynamics we have encountered. I took special note of the mid-size church attendance drop and the large and small church attendance increase.
I have my observations which are: Small church churches and large churches require the least amount of personal time to be volunteered to the church.
Small churches don’t have a lot of activities going on. Larger churches have a larger volunteer base and thus require less time of the individual volunteers. People’s lives are extremely busy and the church is thought of as place to go on my day off or my time off.
Our other observation is that today’s mind set is drastically different than what we experienced from 1990 - 2004.
So far, ALL (no exaggeration) of the people who have came to us from other churches, have been burned out, citing excessive volunteer activity, working in everything from children’s ministry to hospitality. In some cases they were required to spend their own money over and above tithes and offerings, to support the internal church ministries. We haven’t encountered one single person, coming from a mid-size church, who was not in burn out mode. All they have wanted to do, when they came to our church, was sit and receive.
So my observation is that small churches (like ours) and larger churches tend to grow due to mid-size church burn out.
We have also observed that in the understanding of people today, the local church is just one of a myriad of options for resources for personal development, family issues, counseling and financial assistance. People today can access literally hundreds of other organizations, support groups, and information beyond the scope and realm of their local church.
Today's new and young Believers come with a mindset in which no ONE place or ONE set of people are the primary or even secondary resources for all of their needs. Even for spiritual needs, they seek a myriad of resources ranging from Joyce Meyer to Oprah.
Next, we have observed a decreased spiritual literacy. For instance, we made a surprising discovery when our teenagers were thrilled to watch Bible story movies on DVD that are designed for ages 4-8 years old. They had never heard the stories of the Bible and they loved these animated movies.
So we were forced to drastically change our methods and approach to teaching basic Bible doctrine to the level of the people of this era. What we think of as being ministry for children is actual ministry for teens. What we think of as being ministry for teens, is actually what we need for the majority of the congregation.
We found ourselves needing to implement completely radical strategies on Sunday mornings, like hosting a conversation with people instead of presenting a sermon or teaching. Normally, conversation and video clips would be done with the teenagers in a local church, but this strategy became a powerful ministry for our adults in the main service on Sunday mornings.
However, after we did that for a while, attendance again waned as people moved on to other things and went to other places.
Which brings up our final observation about the people of this era: The attention span is very, very short. This is not just the teens and the children. It’s EVERYBODY. That’s because that is our culture today. Everything is a quick status update, a quick Twitter statement, or a quick breaking news sound byte.
We learned that the more we fight against this reality, the faster they’re out the door and moving on to the next thing.
We have dealt with this by playing a 30 second or 1 minute video clip to open the service. We sing only two or three songs in our worship. We don’t elongate the songs. The older members may not like that, but if you want to keep the majority of the folks engaged, we learned that you have to keep it moving. You have to keep the exhortations and encouragement, that's done in-between the songs, down to just a few seconds. We keep the session moving.
We also take a break for refreshments and fellowship in between the worship and the teaching.
When I teach, I use video clips from today’s events to open up my message. I especially use PowerPoint to keep the audience visually engaged. I use large pictures and very little text, unless I’m reading a scripture. I always post the scripture in the PowerPoint so people can read it for themselves.
Finally, I try to keep the message moving because I fully understand; the mental, psychological and spiritual capacity isn't there for the super deep, super spiritual stuff. Now I know why Jesus told stories. The ability and desire to grasp deeper understanding won’t come until we gain people's trust and can engage in personal dialogue and instruction.
Honestly, I cannot determine when a person will be ready for deeper understanding because church attendance is still very sporadic. However, Jesus didn't seem to be in any rush to make that happen, so we’re not going to rush it either.
So there’s a quick review of my personal observations and some of our strategies to deal with a cyber space, facebook, twitter, instagram, iphone, ipad, internet-driven generation.
This week, I want to continue encourage the men. I believe God is assembling an incredible group of guys in our church family. I’ll share something special that has occurred the last two Sundays.
We have a ministry for children. We are very small and attendance is too sporadic to establish a children’s department, so for now, we try to provide ministry for children whenever we have them in attendance.
We had quite a few children to attend a couple of weeks ago and two of our men stepped up to take on the ministry for them. Last Sunday, we again had some children in attendance and two men stepped up to handle it for us.
In each week, one man showed our 30 minute Bible story video and then asked a few follow-up questions to make sure the children got the point of the story. Then another brother stepped in to help by playing with the children the final half hour. You might say that it took two men to do the work of one woman, but my main point is that we broke all of the stereotypical views of ministry by having the guys step up to minister to our children.
They demonstrated the value of this strategy that Nehemiah implemented: Therefore I positioned men behind the lower parts of the wall, at the openings; and I set the people according to their families, with their swords, their spears, and their bows. Nehemiah 4: 13
These guys answered the calling for the men to take their place in the lower positions of the wall. The lower position is right at the foundation of the wall. I look forward to the day when the men will take the lead in many of the vital areas in our community.
The reason this is important to me as a local pastor is because I know what this will do for the ego and confidence of our men and the emotional security and confidence of the women. Let me explain what I mean.
When it comes to a man’s ego and a woman’s emotions, both genders have a difficult time understanding the other. Here’s what both genders are trying to comprehend. Many women think a man’s ego is just his pride and stubbornness. Men think that a woman’s emotions are just her feelings gone out of control.
Ladies, for men, ego is everything. His ego is way more than just his pride. The ego is the essence of that man. It’s about WHO he is and WHAT he is. It is attached to his motivations, hopes, dreams, insecurities and most vulnerable self. He hides his ego with his pride, or with his anger and stubbornness. The outward expression is merely a shield for the ego.
The man with the damaged ego is that person who no longer wants to do anything with his life. He can sit and do nothing all day, every day, for months and years. Even if he has plans and dreams, he no longer has motivation within himself to get up and get back out into the world. That man is a very serious project that will take GOD to heal and reconstruct.
Having said that though, let’s talk about that brother who IS working and trying to survive in this world. When a wife, mother or sister uses the phrase, ‘Why don’t you do this… why don’t you go here… why don’t you want to fix yourself up, or did I hurt your little ego…’ what she has just communicated is that she doesn’t love him for WHO he is. She just communicated that she only loves him for what he can do for her.
What he heard her say was that she doesn’t accept him. He was once THE MAN, but now all these improvements she wants to make on him means she is either embarrassed by him or she no longer loves him for who he is. (In some situations, that’s exactly what she is saying.) However, I’m not presenting a solution. That’s impossible in a short blog. Right now, I’m presenting a perspective that can lead to solutions.
You see, some people (mostly women) like changing their hair, changing clothes, changing styles, and constantly trying to improve and get better stuff. However, there are many MEN, in particular, who don’t feel this way and have no drive to do this. Their drive is for something else.
Their drive is to find fulfillment in accomplishments. Men must have purpose! After obtaining the goal, then they might notice other things that need to be fixed up. Most women seek self-improvement and home-improvement first, and after that has been accomplished, she can go after the other goals and take on the world. Yes, MEN (most of us anyway) are completely the opposite. We want to take on the world first!
So, why am I saying all of this? For a man to take this position at the foundation of the wall, it means God is speaking to and reaching the ego of that man. God is healing the very essence of who he is. God is strengthening and building that warrior, that protector, that provider, that priest and that drive that HE placed within us to accomplish, and fulfill purpose.
That’s why a couple of our men could step up and take on the ministry for the children, instead of deferring it to our women. It was about being the men they are called to be.
When you’re a boy, you live your life focused on what you always wanted to do and what you always wanted to be. But when you become a man, you can hear the voice of God, speaking to your inner man, that ego. To take this lower-wall position, you have to swallow your pride and let go of the childish dreams. You are now taking on the role to live your life for something greater than yourself.
I’ll stop for now and conclude this discussion next week.
Today, I’m thrilled to write this blog to you from my heart. This one is coming from my heart, directly to your home.
To begin, I want to quote a verse from Nehemiah 4: 13 which says:
Therefore I positioned men behind the lower parts of the wall, at the openings; and I set the people according to their families, with their swords, their spears, and their bows.
First of all, I want you to see that the original plan of God was for the heads of households, to be positioned at the lower parts of the wall; at the openings in the walls of our families.
For countless years, our wives, sisters, mothers, and grandmothers have held this position, but I believe that it was the intent of God for MEN (husbands and fathers) to take this role.
The women have been forced to take this role for many reasons. Many were forced to take this role because their family was devastated by divorce, death, or desertion. There are far too many circumstances and situations for me to address in this blog. However, I want to acknowledge that millions of women HAVE done, and ARE doing a phenomenal job in this role.
Actually, I want to acknowledge all single parents (male or female) and grandparents who have stepped up to stand in this position to protect the family. They have fought against the enemies that we talked about during this series of blogs (Sanballat, Tobia, the Ammonites, the Arabs and the Ashdodites) for decades while working two and three jobs, going to school, and raising a family. NO, they weren’t perfect and they didn’t always make the right choices, but they have stood in the gaps for a long time.
Yet, because this wasn’t a role they were meant to take on alone, many have suffered in their bodies, their emotions, and in their relationships. Yes, they have accomplished many things and have seen their families through incredible triumphs, but for many, it has come at a high price to their own well-being.
I would venture to say that most of the people who attend our urban community churches today have been raised primarily by a single parent: a mother, grandmother, or a foster parent. That’s not a judgmental statement. I’m just acknowledging real life and thanking God for His grace and favor.
I also believe this role is talking about our societal and community leadership. We believe it means pastors, politicians, business leaders, educators, entertainers; anyone who has influence, power or control, all have a responsibility to stand in the gaps of the wall.
However, if the person whose supposed to be preventing demonically inspired assaults on our families, has been silent or taken sides with our enemies, then we should expect what we have seen in our families today.
Having said that, I believe this strategy by Nehemiah can be applied to ALL heads of households, whether it is the father, mother, both of them, grandparents or foster parents. Whoever is head of the house needs to understand the SPIRITUAL significance of this position. This is about more than making enough money to make ends meet and helping your children obtain enough education to get free from the cycle of poverty. These are very important aspects of your role, but it also includes setting a standard for the foundational issues in your family’s life. You are to be positioned at the foundation of the wall of your home. You must consider what you are teaching your family by the example of your lifestyle.
In closing my comments for this week, I want to talk to the men in particular. I’m calling the MEN to join me in taking up our position in the opening in the wall. I want to make an appeal to that inner warrior to take your assigned place.
Men have a vital role in taking their place in intercession and prayer for our sisters, our wives, our mothers, and our daughters. I’m tired of watching the men in this city (especially the ones who are 50+ years old like me) who are pursuing young girls that are searching for a father. They’re not looking for a lover. They’re looking to be loved. They’re not looking for a boyfriend. They’re looking for a husband. They’re not looking for a playmate; they’re looking for a soul mate. They’re looking for that guy who will be their champion. She doesn’t want to be a trophy wife. She’s looking for a connection that goes beyond the physical stuff. Sure, for now, she’ll date the old fool, simply because he’s got money. But you better believe that her eyes are still on the young men in her own time zone.
Now ladies, on the other side of this, let me tell you a few of our secrets as men. Many know that this high standard is expected of them, but they never had a father to show them how to reach it. Just like many of you never had a mother to show you how to treat a man, they never had a father to show them how to treat a woman.
Many of us men have never really known what to do. We’ve been screamed at and TOLD what to do, but never SHOWN what to do. So we took our lessons from the guys on the street corner, the guys in the locker room, the guys in the barber shop, the guys that seemed to know how to talk to women, the guys in the pulpit, the guys in the movies, the guys on television, the guys who rapped on stage, and even the guys who broke up with our sisters and mothers.
The ladies may say, ‘How could they listen to those guys?’ and the answer is simple; there wasn’t anybody else. Those were the examples. And what men do is to either follow the examples in front of us, or we try to figure it out for ourselves. Many of us had mothers, sisters and aunts trying to tell us how to be a man, but let me show you how unrealistic that is. Just flip the question. Can a dad teach a girl all she needs to know to become a mature woman, a wife, and a mother?
I don’t say this to take anything away from what the women have done for decades and centuries, but look at the battle strategy of Nehemiah. The MEN were positioned at the wall’s foundation.
That’s why I’m calling the men to take their place in the lower positions of the wall. The lower position is right at the foundation of the wall. If we allow God to place us in the position to protect and lead our families, then perhaps HE can show us how to hold it down. Most men learn things by doing it. We learn as we go. So take your place gentlemen and let’s go!
I’ll stop for now and continue with more next week.
The more we blog about the spiritual battle over our families, the more we realize that God has placed us behind enemy lines like a covert special force unit in the military. He has placed us in one of the fiercest battles in our nation today. It’s a battle for the hearts and homes of America.
This week, we want to talk to you about our internal battles as we fight for our families. As you know, we’ve been following the story of Nehemiah and the rebuilding of Jerusalem’s walls. After the reconstruction began, several enemies conspired together to attack them.
Immediately after receiving the threats from Sanballat, Tobia, the Ammonites, the Arabs and the Ashdodites, the Israelites took a quick inventory to assess their ability to keep working under this threat of attack.
Here is the report that was brought to Nehemiah:
Then Judah said, “The strength of the laborers is failing, and there is so much rubbish that we are not able to build the wall.” And our adversaries said, “They will neither know nor see anything, till we come into their midst and kill them and cause the work to cease.” So it was, when the Jews who dwelt near them came, that they told us ten times, “From whatever place you turn, they will be upon us.” Nehemiah 4: 10-12
First problem: The strength of the laborers is failing. Our strength is failing. Many husbands, wives, sons, daughters, sisters, brothers, and grandparents have just grown tired of trying to build the family any longer.
Have you ever said, ‘I’m tired of trying in this marriage’ or ‘I’m tired of trying in this relationship’? Many times, it’s not that you’re not willing to work at it. It’s just that it never seems to get anywhere when you try. That’s what Judah was hinting at when he said, “There is so much rubbish that we are not able to build the wall.”
It’s one thing to rebuild a marriage, a relationship, or anything you’re trying to reconstruct in your life, but there’s another level of discouragement when all you have to work with is rubbish. The rubbish, in Jerusalem, was the burned out stones and almost worthless material that was left behind from the devastation the city had suffered years earlier.
It’s the same for many of us today. God wants us to rebuild the wall of our city (our families and households), but all we have to build with is the leftover shattered, battered, burned up stones, bricks and wood from years of family heartache and heart break.
You know what we’re talking about: The unreasonable demands, the bullying, the lies, the deception, the dishonesty, the disrespect, the nagging, the insensitivity, the carelessness, the discontent, the unmet expectations, the silent nights (that were not holy nights), the arguments, the fights – and we mean the physical fist-flying stuff, too; the four letter expletive, the feelings that had no words, and the words that had no feelings.
The burned out stones represent our broken dreams, our failures, our shame, and our secrets. They are the ashes of our grief, the only thing left after our sorrow. They are the heaviness we carry around inside of us in our perpetual state of mourning. How can you repair the walls for your family when the only material that you have is rubbish and burned out, brittle, crumbling stones?
God says in His Word: Even the youths shall faint and be weary, And the young men shall utterly fall, But those who wait on the Lord Shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:30-31 (NKJV)
The Hebrew word for WAIT means: to look for, hope, expect, look eagerly for, or to linger. One word picture is to be like a waiter or waitress. To stand and wait for the order, request, words, and direction. The person who stands like a servant and eagerly lingers, with hope and expectation, for the order, word, and directions from the Lord will renew their strength.
Renew means to go through, grow up, change, to go on from where you are now. This means your strength is going to go through this time. It’s going to grow up. It’s going to go on from where it is right now.
I did a quick study about the bald eagle and learned something special about part of its life span. In their five year development to adulthood, bald eagles go through one of the most varied plumage changes of any North American bird. During its first four weeks of life, an eaglet’s fluffy white down changes to a gray wooly down. At about five weeks, brown and black feathers begin to grow. It becomes fully feathered at 10 weeks of age. In its first year, the mostly dark-colored bald eagle can often be mistaken as a golden eagle. However, the bald eagle progressively changes until it reaches adult plumage at five years. Its dark eye lightens throughout its first four years of life until it becomes yellow. They are constantly renewing as they get older.
If you and I wait upon the Lord, live expecting God’s word, live receiving God’s word, live obeying God’s word, we are renewed as we grow in His Word like the bald eagle is renewed as it grows to maturity.
We cannot rebuild our families and households until we get renewed in our own hearts. So let’s remain consistent and persistent in our pursuit of God. Wait on Him daily. He will give you the strength to rebuild, in spite of the rubbish and in spite of the threats of the enemy.
