Strategies for 21st Century Church Attendees

I read an article about the trends of church attendance in America today. I responded with the following:

I loved the article. It definitely describes the dynamics we have encountered. I took special note of the mid-size church attendance drop and the large and small church attendance increase.

I have my observations which are:  Small church churches and large churches require the least amount of personal time to be volunteered to the church.

Small churches don’t have a lot of activities going on. Larger churches have a larger volunteer base and thus require less time of the individual volunteers. People’s lives are extremely busy and the church is thought of as place to go on my day off or my time off.

Our other observation is that today’s mind set is drastically different than what we experienced from 1990 - 2004.

So far, ALL (no exaggeration) of the people who have came to us from other churches, have been burned out, citing excessive volunteer activity, working in everything from children’s ministry to hospitality. In some cases they were required to spend their own money over and above tithes and offerings, to support the internal church ministries.  We haven’t encountered one single person, coming from a mid-size church, who was not in burn out mode. All they have wanted to do, when they came to our church, was sit and receive.

So my observation is that small churches (like ours) and larger churches tend to grow due to mid-size church burn out.

We have also observed that in the understanding of people today, the local church is just one of a myriad of options for resources for personal development, family issues, counseling and financial assistance. People today can access literally hundreds of other organizations, support groups, and information beyond the scope and realm of their local church.

Today's new and young Believers come with a mindset in which no ONE place or ONE set of people are the primary or even secondary resources for all of their needs.  Even for spiritual needs, they seek a myriad of resources ranging from Joyce Meyer to Oprah.

Next, we have observed a decreased spiritual literacy. For instance, we made a surprising discovery when our teenagers were thrilled to watch Bible story movies on DVD  that are designed for ages 4-8 years old. They had never heard the stories of the Bible and they loved these animated movies.

So we were forced to drastically change our methods and approach to teaching basic Bible doctrine to the level of the people of this era. What we think of as being ministry for children is actual ministry for teens. What we think of as being ministry for teens, is actually what we need for the majority of the congregation.

We found ourselves needing to implement completely radical strategies on Sunday mornings, like hosting a conversation with people instead of presenting a sermon or teaching. Normally, conversation and video clips would be done with the teenagers in a local church, but this strategy became a powerful ministry for our adults in the main service on Sunday mornings.

However, after we did that for a while, attendance again waned as people moved on to other things and went to other places.

Which brings up our final observation about the people of this era: The attention span is very, very short. This is not just the teens and the children. It’s EVERYBODY. That’s because that is our culture today. Everything is a quick status update, a quick Twitter statement, or a quick breaking news sound byte.

We learned that the more we fight against this reality, the faster they’re out the door and moving on to the next thing.

We have dealt with this by playing a 30 second or 1 minute video clip to open the service. We sing only two or three songs in our worship. We don’t elongate the songs. The older members may not like that, but if you want to keep the majority of the folks engaged, we learned that you have to keep it moving. You have to keep the exhortations and encouragement, that's done in-between the songs, down to just a few seconds. We keep the session moving.

We also take a break for refreshments and fellowship in between the worship and the teaching.

When I teach, I use video clips from today’s events to open up my message. I especially use PowerPoint to keep the audience visually engaged. I use large pictures and very little text, unless I’m reading a scripture. I always post the scripture in the PowerPoint so people can read it for themselves.

Finally, I try to keep the message moving because I fully understand; the mental, psychological and spiritual capacity isn't there for the super deep, super spiritual stuff.  Now I know why Jesus told stories. The ability and desire to grasp deeper understanding  won’t come until we gain people's trust and can engage in personal dialogue and instruction.

Honestly,  I cannot determine when a person will be ready for deeper understanding because church attendance is still very sporadic. However, Jesus didn't seem to be in any rush to make that happen, so we’re not going to rush it either.

So there’s a quick review of my personal observations and some of our strategies to deal with a cyber space, facebook, twitter, instagram, iphone, ipad, internet-driven generation.

Living for Something Greater Than Yourself

This week, I want to continue encourage the men. I believe God is assembling an incredible group of guys in our church family. I’ll share something special that has occurred the last two Sundays.

We have a ministry for children. We are very small and attendance is too sporadic to establish a children’s department, so for now, we try to provide ministry for children whenever we have them in attendance.

We had quite a few children to attend a couple of weeks ago and two of our men stepped up to take on the ministry for them. Last Sunday, we again had some children in attendance and two men stepped up to handle it for us. 

In each week, one man showed our 30 minute Bible story video and then asked a few follow-up questions to make sure the children got the point of the story. Then another brother stepped in to help by playing with the children the final half hour. You might say that it took two men to do the work of one woman, but my main point is that we broke all of the stereotypical views of ministry by having the guys step up to minister to our children.

They demonstrated the value of this strategy that Nehemiah implemented: Therefore I positioned men behind the lower parts of the wall, at the openings; and I set the people according to their families, with their swords, their spears, and their bows. Nehemiah 4: 13

These guys answered the calling for the men to take their place in the lower positions of the wall. The lower position is right at the foundation of the wall. I look forward to the day when the men will take the lead in many of the vital areas in our community.

The reason this is important to me as a local pastor is because I know what this will do for the ego and confidence of our men and the emotional security and confidence of the women. Let me explain what I mean.

When it comes to a man’s ego and a woman’s emotions, both genders have a difficult time understanding the other. Here’s what both genders are trying to comprehend. Many women think a man’s ego is just his pride and stubbornness. Men think that a woman’s emotions are just her feelings gone out of control.

Ladies, for men, ego is everything. His ego is way more than just his pride. The ego is the essence of that man. It’s about WHO he is and WHAT he is. It is attached to his motivations, hopes, dreams, insecurities and most vulnerable self. He hides his ego with his pride, or with his anger and stubbornness. The outward expression is merely a shield for the ego.

The man with the damaged ego is that person who no longer wants to do anything with his life. He can sit and do nothing all day, every day, for months and years. Even if he has plans and dreams, he no longer has motivation within himself to get up and get back out into the world. That man is a very serious project that will take GOD to heal and reconstruct.

Having said that though, let’s talk about that brother who IS working and trying to survive in this world. When a wife, mother or sister uses the phrase, ‘Why don’t you do this… why don’t you go here… why don’t you want to fix yourself up, or did I hurt your little ego…’ what she has just communicated is that she doesn’t love him for WHO he is. She just communicated that she only loves him for what he can do for her.

What he heard her say was that she doesn’t accept him. He was once THE MAN, but now all these improvements she wants to make on him means she is either embarrassed by him or she no longer loves him for who he is. (In some situations, that’s exactly what she is saying.) However, I’m not presenting a solution. That’s impossible in a short blog. Right now, I’m presenting a perspective that can lead to solutions.

You see, some people (mostly women) like changing their hair, changing clothes, changing styles, and constantly trying to improve and get better stuff. However, there are many MEN, in particular, who don’t feel this way and have no drive to do this. Their drive is for something else.

Their drive is to find fulfillment in accomplishments. Men must have purpose! After obtaining the goal, then they might notice other things that need to be fixed up. Most women seek self-improvement and home-improvement first, and after that has been accomplished, she can go after the other goals and take on the world. Yes, MEN (most of us anyway) are completely the opposite. We want to take on the world first!

So, why am I saying all of this? For a man to take this position at the foundation of the wall, it means God is speaking to and reaching the ego of that man. God is healing the very essence of who he is. God is strengthening and building that warrior, that protector, that provider, that priest and that drive that HE placed within us to accomplish, and fulfill purpose.

That’s why a couple of our men could step up and take on the ministry for the children, instead of deferring it to our women. It was about being the men they are called to be.

When you’re a boy, you live your life focused on what you always wanted to do and what you always wanted to be. But when you become a man, you can hear the voice of God, speaking to your inner man, that ego. To take this lower-wall position, you have to swallow your pride and let go of the childish dreams. You are now taking on the role to live your life for something greater than yourself.

I’ll stop for now and conclude this discussion next week.

Placed in Position to Protect

Today, I’m thrilled to write this blog to you from my heart. This one is coming from my heart, directly to your home.

To begin, I want to quote a verse from Nehemiah 4: 13 which says:
Therefore I positioned men behind the lower parts of the wall, at the openings; and I set the people according to their families, with their swords, their spears, and their bows.

First of all, I want you to see that the original plan of God was for the heads of households, to be positioned at the lower parts of the wall; at the openings in the walls of our families.

For countless years, our wives, sisters, mothers, and grandmothers have held this position, but I believe that it was the intent of God for MEN (husbands and fathers) to take this role.

The women have been forced to take this role for many reasons. Many were forced to take this role because their family was devastated by divorce, death, or desertion. There are far too many circumstances and situations for me to address in this blog. However, I want to acknowledge that millions of women HAVE done, and ARE doing a phenomenal job in this role.

Actually, I want to acknowledge all single parents (male or female) and grandparents who have stepped up to stand in this position to protect the family. They have fought against the enemies that we talked about during this series of blogs (Sanballat, Tobia, the Ammonites, the Arabs and the Ashdodites) for decades while working two and three jobs, going to school, and raising a family. NO, they weren’t perfect and they didn’t always make the right choices, but they have stood in the gaps for a long time.

Yet, because this wasn’t a role they were meant to take on alone, many have suffered in their bodies, their emotions, and in their relationships. Yes, they have accomplished many things and have seen their families through incredible triumphs, but for many, it has come at a high price to their own well-being.

I would venture to say that most of the people who attend our urban community churches today have been raised primarily by a single parent: a mother, grandmother, or a foster parent. That’s not a judgmental statement. I’m just acknowledging real life and thanking God for His grace and favor.

I also believe this role is talking about our societal and community leadership. We believe it means pastors, politicians, business leaders, educators, entertainers; anyone who has influence, power or control, all have a responsibility to stand in the gaps of the wall.

However, if the person whose supposed to be preventing demonically inspired assaults on our families, has been silent or taken sides with our enemies, then we should expect what we have seen in our families today.

Having said that, I believe this strategy by Nehemiah can be applied to ALL heads of households, whether it is the father, mother, both of them, grandparents or foster parents. Whoever is head of the house needs to understand the SPIRITUAL significance of this position. This is about more than making enough money to make ends meet and helping your children obtain enough education to get free from the cycle of poverty. These are very important aspects of your role, but it also includes setting a standard for the foundational issues in your family’s life. You are to be positioned at the foundation of the wall of your home. You must consider what you are teaching your family by the example of your lifestyle.

In closing my comments for this week, I want to talk to the men in particular. I’m calling the MEN to join me in taking up our position in the opening in the wall. I want to make an appeal to that inner warrior to take your assigned place.

Men have a vital role in taking their place in intercession and prayer for our sisters, our wives, our mothers, and our daughters. I’m tired of watching the men in this city (especially the ones who are 50+ years old like me) who are pursuing young girls that are searching for a father. They’re not looking for a lover. They’re looking to be loved. They’re not looking for a boyfriend. They’re looking for a husband. They’re not looking for a playmate; they’re looking for a soul mate. They’re looking for that guy who will be their champion. She doesn’t want to be a trophy wife. She’s looking for a connection that goes beyond the physical stuff. Sure, for now, she’ll date the old fool, simply because he’s got money. But you better believe that her eyes are still on the young men in her own time zone.

Now ladies, on the other side of this, let me tell you a few of our secrets as men. Many know that this high standard is expected of them, but they never had a father to show them how to reach it. Just like many of you never had a mother to show you how to treat a man, they never had a father to show them how to treat a woman.

Many of us men have never really known what to do. We’ve been screamed at and TOLD what to do, but never SHOWN what to do. So we took our lessons from the guys on the street corner, the guys in the locker room, the guys in the barber shop, the guys that seemed to know how to talk to women, the guys in the pulpit, the guys in the movies, the guys on television, the guys who rapped on stage, and even the guys who broke up with our sisters and mothers.

The ladies may say, ‘How could they listen to those guys?’ and the answer is simple; there wasn’t anybody else. Those were the examples. And what men do is to either follow the examples in front of us, or we try to figure it out for ourselves. Many of us had mothers, sisters and aunts trying to tell us how to be a man, but let me show you how unrealistic that is. Just flip the question. Can a dad teach a girl all she needs to know to become a mature woman, a wife, and a mother?

I don’t say this to take anything away from what the women have done for decades and centuries, but look at the battle strategy of Nehemiah. The MEN were positioned at the wall’s foundation.

That’s why I’m calling the men to take their place in the lower positions of the wall. The lower position is right at the foundation of the wall. If we allow God to place us in the position to protect and lead our families, then perhaps HE can show us how to hold it down. Most men learn things by doing it. We learn as we go. So take your place gentlemen and let’s go!
  
I’ll stop for now and continue with more next week.

Renewed to Rebuild

The more we blog about the spiritual battle over our families, the more we realize that God has placed us behind enemy lines like a covert special force unit in the military. He has placed us in one of the fiercest battles in our nation today. It’s a battle for the hearts and homes of America.

This week, we want to talk to you about our internal battles as we fight for our families. As you know, we’ve been following the story of Nehemiah and the rebuilding of Jerusalem’s walls. After the reconstruction began, several enemies conspired together to attack them.

Immediately after receiving the threats from Sanballat, Tobia, the Ammonites, the Arabs and the Ashdodites, the Israelites took a quick inventory to assess their ability to keep working under this threat of attack.

Here is the report that was brought to Nehemiah:

Then Judah said, “The strength of the laborers is failing, and there is so much rubbish that we are not able to build the wall.” And our adversaries said, “They will neither know nor see anything, till we come into their midst and kill them and cause the work to cease.” So it was, when the Jews who dwelt near them came, that they told us ten times, “From whatever place you turn, they will be upon us.” Nehemiah 4: 10-12

First problem: The strength of the laborers is failing. Our strength is failing. Many husbands, wives, sons, daughters, sisters, brothers, and grandparents have just grown tired of trying to build the family any longer.

Have you ever said, ‘I’m tired of trying in this marriage’ or ‘I’m tired of trying in this relationship’? Many times, it’s not that you’re not willing to work at it. It’s just that it never seems to get anywhere when you try. That’s what Judah was hinting at when he said, “There is so much rubbish that we are not able to build the wall.”

It’s one thing to rebuild a marriage, a relationship, or anything you’re trying to reconstruct in your life, but there’s another level of discouragement when all you have to work with is rubbish. The rubbish, in Jerusalem, was the burned out stones and almost worthless material that was left behind from the devastation the city had suffered years earlier.

It’s the same for many of us today. God wants us to rebuild the wall of our city (our families and households), but all we have to build with is the leftover shattered, battered, burned up stones, bricks and wood from years of family heartache and heart break.

You know what we’re talking about: The unreasonable demands, the bullying, the lies, the deception, the dishonesty, the disrespect, the nagging, the insensitivity, the carelessness, the discontent, the unmet expectations, the silent nights (that were not holy nights), the arguments, the fights – and we mean the physical fist-flying stuff, too; the four letter expletive, the feelings that had no words, and the words that had no feelings.

The burned out stones represent our broken dreams, our failures, our shame, and our secrets. They are the ashes of our grief, the only thing left after our sorrow. They are the heaviness we carry around inside of us in our perpetual state of mourning. How can you repair the walls for your family when the only material that you have is rubbish and burned out, brittle, crumbling stones?

God says in His Word: Even the youths shall faint and be weary, And the young men shall utterly fall, But those who wait on the Lord Shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:30-31 (NKJV)

The Hebrew word for WAIT means: to look for, hope, expect, look eagerly for, or to linger. One word picture is to be like a waiter or waitress. To stand and wait for the order, request, words, and direction. The person who stands like a servant and eagerly lingers, with hope and expectation, for the order, word, and directions from the Lord will renew their strength.

Renew means to go through, grow up, change, to go on from where you are now. This means your strength is going to go through this time. It’s going to grow up. It’s going to go on from where it is right now.

I did a quick study about the bald eagle and learned something special about part of its life span. In their five year development to adulthood, bald eagles go through one of the most varied plumage changes of any North American bird. During its first four weeks of life, an eaglet’s fluffy white down changes to a gray wooly down. At about five weeks, brown and black feathers begin to grow. It becomes fully feathered at 10 weeks of age. In its first year, the mostly dark-colored bald eagle can often be mistaken as a golden eagle. However, the bald eagle progressively changes until it reaches adult plumage at five years. Its dark eye lightens throughout its first four years of life until it becomes yellow. They are constantly renewing as they get older.

If you and I wait upon the Lord, live expecting God’s word, live receiving God’s word, live obeying God’s word, we are renewed as we grow in His Word like the bald eagle is renewed as it grows to maturity.

We cannot rebuild our families and households until we get renewed in our own hearts. So let’s remain consistent and persistent in our pursuit of God. Wait on Him daily. He will give you the strength to rebuild, in spite of the rubbish and in spite of the threats of the enemy.

The Real Enemies

Way back in 1994, I wrote a song called ‘What If’ and our youth ministry’s rap/evangelistic group took the tune and added a rap within the chorus. In that rap, a brilliant young lady asked the question, “Who’s the real enemy?” She challenged many of the negative issues in the urban community, but she kept taking her listeners back to the question: Who’s the real enemy?

Now, 18 years later, we find ourselves still asking the same question. We’re in a city that’s 800 miles from where we started, but God is moving in a powerful way as HE leads us in the fight for our families. This week we want to answer that question and identify a few of the enemies of our families.

Nehemiah 4:7-8 reads: Now it happened, when Sanballat, Tobiah, the Arabs, the Ammonites, and the Ashdodites heard that the walls of Jerusalem were being restored and the gaps were beginning to be closed, that they became very angry, and all of them conspired together to come and attack Jerusalem and create confusion.

Let’s take a closer look at these guys.

Sanballat was a Moabite. The Moabites were descendants of Lot. He had sex with one of his daughters and the child that was born was named Moab, Thus began the Moabite people. The Moabites worshipped Chemosh (ke-mosh).
This god was honored with cruel and perverse practices like child sacrifices (burning babies alive) and heterosexual, homosexual and bi-sexual orgies.  Sanballat represents the acceptance of heterosexual perversion and homosexuality. He represents the willingness to sacrifice our children for wealth and personal success. He represents those family secrets like molestation, incest, rape and abortion. These are major evil spiritual forces that are opposing your efforts to rebuild your family.

Tobia was an Ammonite. They were descendants of Lot also. Ben-Ammi was the child born to Lot after he had sex with his younger daughter. The resulting people group, the Ammonites, opposed the Israelites when they attempted to pass through their land in the Exodus. They had a history of making unreasonable demands in order to allow passage or when attacking others around them. They were bullies.

Tobia and the Ammonites represent those people and influences that seek to hinder your family from achieving goals and fulfilling purpose. They are constantly harassing and bullying anyone who is trying to do the right thing or live a Godly life. This is especially true when we observe this type of spiritual opposition to your efforts to rebuild your family.

The Arabs are the descendants of Ishmael, who was the son of Abraham from his wife's handmaiden, Hagar. Jews are descendants of Abraham's son Isaac from his wife Sarah. Therefore, Arabs and Jews both came from Abraham. Most Arabs, believe that it was Ishmael who has the birthright as Abraham’s first born. Jews and Christians hold to the understanding that Isaac has the birthright because he was the promised seed that came through Abraham’s wife.

In the context of this blog, the Arabs represent the spiritual forces that contest your birthrights. They contest and fight against your rights to raise your children, your rights to protect your family, your rights to freedom of expression, and your rights to freedom of religious practice.

The last group we’ll talk about are the Ashdodites. They were Philistines and their name referred to the city in which they resided. The city’s name means, “I will spoil" The spoiler is that person who knows they can't defeat you, but they will do everything they can to cause as much hurt, harm and damage as they can anyway.

In sports, there are teams who have lost so many games that they no longer qualify for the playoffs or any championship bid. They take on the role as spoiler: to knock out other teams and put them in the same position.

Ashdodites represent the people who allow this evil spirit to work through them. They live in defeat. They aren’t going anywhere and aren’t going to do anything with their lives, yet they become envious and do all they can to prevent others from accomplishing their goals and dreams. That's the attitude and motivation of satan and demonic powers. They blew their chance with God, and now they work to spoil your life and your family. They know how things will end when all is said and done. However, they want to drag down as many people as they can.

As you can see, these are some formidable forces that are opposing us as we seek to fight for our families. Just remember that the individuals or groups who are conspiring against you are not your real enemies. They are merely tools being used by satan and demonic powers. They have been so influenced by these evil spirits that they are convinced that they are right and you are wrong.

Now can you see how you and your family are being attacked? These are the spiritual forces that are at work against us. Please understand that the moment you decided to rebuild, restore and renew your family, these attacks were launched against you to create confusion and discouragement. But here is our response. Nehemiah 4:9 says - Nevertheless we made our prayer to our God, and because of them we set a watch against them day and night.

We're not going to launch political protest and campaigns. We are not advocating bashing anyone who is gay. We’re not approving the bombing of abortion clinics or the shooting of abortionist. We are not going to organize protest at city hall, the state capitol or at school district buildings. We're just going to set a prayer-watch against the enemy, day and night. Will you join with us this year and pray?

Several leaders in our city are seeking to rally the whole city behind various causes and agendas. We have received invitations from various groups, some of whom are very outspoken against one another. That leaves us trying to pick and choose which meetings, rallies and revivals we should connect with in order to restore the city.

We learned a valuable lesson back in our years in St. Louis. Our pastor and church were in a very similar position in our early years of growth. In larger cities, there are hundreds of agendas and efforts being made to revive it, so our pastor was getting invitations from all over the city and even several from around the country with all the rallies to revive America.

Our pastor came to a place where he just stopped trying to respond to the invitations and he even stopped trying to rally the whole city to come to his gatherings. Instead, he just began to focus on US, the church family. When he invited out of town guest, he didn’t announce it to the city. The guests (some were high profile) were brought to our city to minister to US.... and ONLY US. For a long season, our pastor stopped attending the major national church conferences and poured everything into his own church family.

The result was a ministry that exploded and became a powerful prayer force in our city. That’s how the Lord is leading us today. God didn’t tell us to come to Harrisburg and try to win, rally or revive the city. God sent us to Harrisburg and told us to bring FAMILIES together. That doesn’t mean all families will come to our Urban Life family prayer gatherings. It just means God has given us a mandate to call families together. God sent us to Harrisburg to share our lives and the Word with YOU. Our calling is not to reach ALL of Harrisburg. Our calling is to minister to YOU.

That’s why we encourage you to keep pressing through all the opposition and continue to take advantage of our Sunday Gatherings. They are small gatherings, but they have proven to make a big impact on our hearts and homes.

We’re just trying to do all that we can to help you and your household. We’re all in this battle together. Let’s keep pressing forward.